Chapter 26 - Mira
The warm shower washes away the embarrassment of being rejected. One minute Alpha Nikolaos acts like he wants me, the next he looks at me as if I'm the most disgusting thing he's ever seen.
It happened the second I touched his skin. In my stupid haze of pleasure, I forgot about the one thing he’s dead set against. How could I allow myself to do something like that? This man, he muddles up my head so I don't think clearly when I'm around him.
But why is it only his bare chest? What happened to him?
/“He...has a past filled with pain. It would be a pity to see you add to it."/
Is this what Maxim meant? Is this why he hates being touched and yet he can touch me? With a sigh and my mind made up, I get out of the shower, put on my PJs and go to his bedroom. This needs to stop now; either he tells me what he wants from me or I give this ring back.
I open my bedroom door and see Josef sitting in his usual spot, playing with his knife and not looking up at me. “Is the Alpha here?” I ask.
He looks up and nods. “He's in his gym; he's been there most of the afternoon and early evening.” “Take me to him,” I say and walk out of my bedroom. “Or I'll ask someone else if you're still pissy with me.”
Ignoring Josef's complaints, I walk down the hallway until he catches up to me. He's about to say something until he sees the look on my face and shuts up. Nodding, he walks ahead and leads me further down the hall.
We come to a stop in front of twin oak doors, which he opens for me. “He's in here,” Josef says and stands next to the door without looking at me.
“Thank you, Josef," I say as I walk inside and he closes the door behind me.
I am nearly knocked over by Alpha Nikolaos’ scent hanging heavy in the room. Leather and spice tinged with fury, I struggle to catch my breath the more I'm breathing it in. He's been down here since he left the pool area, that's basically what Josef said.
But why is he angry? Is his fury aimed at me for touching him?
The bed moves as if someone's sitting down on it. “I don't... don’t know what I want.” Alpha Nikolaos says before he sighs. “I won't lose my temper again. Don't worry.”
“I can't help but worry about you, Alpha. For both of you. You two are growing closer and you know how dangerous-"
“That's enough, Lilah. Let me handle this,” he interjects, and I hear her sigh.
“She doesn’t need more uncertainty,” Dr. Lilah says before I hear her heels clicking and the door closing.
I don't know what this exchange is about but it sounded heated, as if they've been at it for a while. My heartbeat picks up at the thought of them arguing about me and I wonder what else they have said.
"How long are you going to pretend you're not awake?”
His voice makes my eyes snap open and I sit up too quickly, causing the room to spin. I lean my hand on the pillow next to me while the other holds my head. “Ow...” I groan and I feel the mattress dip.
Alpha Nikolaos is on his haunches next to the bed when I open my eyes again; his green eyes are wide and his brow is furrowed. He takes my hand in his and asks, “Are you okay?"
I take my hand out of his grasp and swing my legs over the bed, forcing him to back up. “I'm okay,” I say, slowly getting to my feet, but he gently pushes me down.
“Lilah has put you on bed rest, so you're not going anywhere, Mia,” he says with a stern expression. “You're welcome to stay here for a while. I'll leave.”
He doesn't wait for me to answer and turns to walk out, but as he reaches the door, I call out to him. "Alpha Nikolaos.”
Stopping as he reaches for the door, I hear his heartbeat picking up, but he doesn’t turn around to face me. “Yes, Mia?"
I get to my feet and swallow deeply. “I wanted to apologize for touching you this morning. Being that close to you...it made me forget about your hard limits and turned you into... the person I saw in the gym today.”
Alpha Nikolaos spins around, his crimson eyes wide with shock and anger. “You think it was your fault?” he asks in a low voice, stalking towards me.
But I don't back away this time. “Wasn't it? You turned cold and rejected me as soon as I touched you,” I say, shrugging. “If I didn't, you wouldn't have-"Belongs to (N)ôvel/Drama.Org.
He's in front of me before I can breathe and takes my face in his hands; his crimson eyes shimmer back to their mossy green. Shaking his head, he looks at me in disbelief.
“Mia, nothing was your fault. I don't know why you would blame yourself like that. This...the person you saw today...that was my fault, no one else's.” He says. “Never blame yourself like that. You're not responsible for my triggers.”
I scoff sadly. “That's just it, though; I don't know what your triggers are, I only know when I set them off. You say I'm yours, you say I make you feel and my head is such a mess when you leave. So please, tell me what you want from me, Nikolaos.”
The pleading look in his eyes breaks my heart, and I don’t know what he’s thinking as he looks at me. What is he trying to say without using the words? What has hurt him so much that he’s taking it out on me?
He smiles sadly and strokes my cheek with the back of his thumbs. “I want you, but my demons will only serve to ruin you more, Mia, because that's all I ever do. So for now, I will keep my distance and not confuse you any more than I already have.” He says, then he kisses my forehead and lets go of me.
I realize what he’s doing and snap out of my thoughts as he opens the door. “No...No, you can't-!" “It's for the best,” he says and walks out, leaving me a shattered mess on his bedroom floor. Once again I'm the one who's left in tatters. Once again he walks away from me as if I'm nothing.