Chapter 75 Seal It With A Kiss
Chapter 75 Seal It With A Kiss
Evelyn
"Fucking bastard," I muttered into the pillow, unable to suppress my sobs any longer. They had been building up over the past few hours, and now they flowed freely. No matter what I did-they wouldn't stop.
That Italian piece of shit regarded me as nothing more than a disposable toy, someone he could use at his convenience. When he decided it was no longer suitable or fit his so-called sudden morals, he concocted twisted games to cast me aside. Did he see himself as a deity? Or maybe Jesus Christ? The only one responsible for making things right?
Who gave him the right to define what was right? Certainly not me. I never once implied it, yet this sick motherfucker chose to play god.
If he fucking knew it was wrong, why did he fucking took it so far? If he really had to play god, why didn't he play it sooner and spare me from the heartache?!
I held no expectations for my mother; that much I could admit. Her actions hurt, but Jacob... How could he? How could he just change his mind after a simple lecture from someone? Was he that easily influenced? He was not a five-year-old kid to be influenced!
What was going on inside his head anyway?
Not only did he deceive me, but he also fucking shattered me.
That despicable bastard... I would never forgive him. Never.
The fact that one conversation could cause him to abandon all the promises and dreams he shared with me made it clear that he never truly loved
me.
"That bastard never fucking loved me," I cried out, curling into a ball on the bed and hugging myself, "Coward! A bloody coward!"
To be honest I was the bigger idiot here. So fucking naive and foolish.
Why did I risk falling in love with a man like him? A man so far out of reach and so sinful to even look at. I should have realised from the beginning that it would lead to disaster. But fuck me! I was reckless, I willingly jumped into the abyss and dove deep, all the way knowing that climbing up to the surface would be harder than ever. Simply impossible.
Hell! I knew the dangers that lurked there. His sinful green eyes and a face too perfect to be real should have been warning signs. They should have been enough to alert me that he was a red flag, a ticking time bomb. Yet, I still dove headfirst into the chaos.
My desires clouded my judgment. They stripped me of my senses and left me broken. And now, here I stood, losing everything I had held onto. "How could he lie to me all this time? How could he do this to me?" I sobbed, speaking to myself, as there was no one else I felt comfortable sharing my vulnerability with. I hated feeling like this but Jacob had taken away everything and left only this lingering feeling within.
God! I couldn't even wrap my head around it. Even his eyes had deceived me when he uttered those cruel words. He was heartless and cruel. I now found myself questioning if all those times he had spent with me, the kisses, the times he held me in his arms, the moments when he wiped my tears and filled me with joy, those nights he made love to me did his eyes ever reflect the truth, or were they lying the entire time?
Shit, Evelyn. You are so fucking stupid!
"I hate you, Jacob. I fucking hate you," I cried, sitting up and wiping my tears away. My gaze shifted to the portrait of him that still adorned my room. Writing 'mistake' over it wasn't sufficient.
I should destroy it. Yes, I should fucking destroy this!
I rose from the bed, and seized the canvas, and a pair of scissors. Just as I was about to pierce his eye with the scissors, a knock on the door shattered the room's silence.
"Who is it?" I inquired, my frustration boiling over.
At this point, I just wanted to end Jacob's existence and be done with it, or maybe dig another grave beside him solely for me because I simply did not know how I was supposed to live without him. I wondered if he had any inkling of the pain he'd caused me. I bet he had not even spared a thought before getting himself involved in this senseless act. This stupid sick charade.
Both my mother and Jacob had played me. They made me look like a fool when I was silently dying in pain, every single moment.
"It's me, Evelyn," the unmistakable voice of my tormentor emanated from behind the door.
This jerk...
"You sick bastard, get the hell away from here!" I shouted from within my room, my legs instinctively carrying me to the door, although I didn't open it. I merely stood firmly against it.
"I will, but can we please talk for a while?" The audacity of this man to sound so calm and collected when I was a complete mess. He had made me this mess-It was all his deed.
"Talk?" I laughed bitterly-he had to
be kidding me, "Now you want to talk, huh? You didn't bother to 'talk' when you decided to break my fucking heart, heed my mother's whims just to showcase how fucking gem of a person you You didn't 'talk' when you dumped me declared you were back with that bitch, and you certainly didn't 'talk' when you lied to my face, hurling those cruel words and insults at me without hesitation, calling me a distraction in ten different ways. So why the hell do you need to talk now, huh? Why?"
"Because... I'm leaving tonight, Evelyn. I don't know if I'll ever see you again, hold you in my arms," his voice cracked, "Can you please let me in and let us be like the old times, just for a while?"
My body froze and my anger dissipated in a matter of a single second, though I didn't want it to. I certainly didn't want it to.
Why should I give him a chance to be close again when he was the one who got away? Why should I be the one to forgive his mistakes, knowing full well that he was in the wrong?
My mind told me not to open the door.
Yes, I shouldn't open the door. This is the right decision.
He had chosen to leave, so he should stay away for the rest of his life.
"Please, open the door, love," he spoke again, his voice coaxing my inflamed heart, "I know I've made a mistake, but please... let me in, just one last time."
No, I shouldn't...
Before my thoughts could fully form, my body sprang into motion, and I found myself grabbing the doorknob and opening the door. His face came into view, instantly erasing every thought in my mind.
This was one of the many times when I felt like hating God for creating him. I absolutely did.This belongs to NôvelDrama.Org: ©.
"Evelyn... I..." Before he could say more, I grabbed his wrist and with a swift motion, I threw him onto the bed, slamming the door shut.
With the scissors still in my hand, I straddled him and leaned in close to his face. I positioned the sharp edge of the scissors right at the base of his throat, tears still streaking down my cheeks. "You don't know it, but ...I can fucking kill you right now, Jacob! I can stab this scissoninto your neck and finish you right here for what you did to me!" A sob threatened to escape my throat, but I held it back, "And you know what? killing you would be the least of
what I should do! It'd be the absolute least!"
His soft and ever-manipulative green eyes looked at me with nothing but what I could only call love. Fuck I hated to admit it but there was no way I could deny that it looked like love, when in reality, I should have harbored a thousand doubts about him by now.
"I'm sorry, Evelyn. I never wanted to hurt you, but it was the only way left," he raised his hand and attempted to caress my cheek as he tried to get up, but I swatted his hand away and pushed him back onto the bed.
"Don't you dare touch me, Jacob! You have no idea what you've done. Do you even realise how much it
hurt me? How those words ripped my heart apart into pieces? I literally felt it break you asshole! I felt it fucking break. How could you do this to me? How could you crush my whole world in between your goddamn fingers?! Do you even know how much I am hurting deep down even now?" I demanded, gripping his collar tightly, the scissors still poised in place, "You don't, no matter what you think. You don't have a clue! I am dying, Jacob! I was dying every second, every minute of the day-I still am. And even if I were to plunge this scissor into your chest, it would be nothing compared to the pain you inflicted on me. It would be nothing. Absolutely nothing!"
My hands shook, and my breath came out in ragged pants as I tried to contain the sobs and not break down before him. The tears, however,
streamed down my cheeks relentlessly. I looked at him, my eyes filled with pain and anger that he could clearly see.
I didn't even know how I was supposed to calm down. Everything felt excruciating.
And....Just when I thought I was about to crumble and fall apart, Jacob slowly sat up. His hands moved to cup my face, and he pressed his forehead against mine. My body began to melt, just as it always did.
Damn! I didn't want this ... .but it was so hard to deny his touch that was nothing short of heaven.
Dropping the scissors, I tried to push him away, my sobs finally slipping past my lips, "Coward! You fucking coward!" I pounded my fists against his chest, hitting him with all the strength I had. I doubted any of my futile attacks affected his broad figure this jerk had always had this advantage, "You're such a coward. A worthless, insecure, foolish, and weak man! A stupid asshole! Get away from me! Get the hell-"
Before I could utter another word, he slipped his hand around my waist, drawing my body close with a swift jerk until there wasn't a single inch of distance between us. And then, without sparing me a chance to protest, he grabbed the back of my neck and pressed his lips against mine.